The Closet isn't just for Clothes

Are closets really just for clothes?

Coming out is a big part of the LGBT teen and adult community. Many television shows have LGBT main characters that come out including Buffy The Vampire Slayer, My So Called Life, Dawson’s Creek, Degrassi: The Next Generation, and As The World Turns. And as of the past two weeks GLEE has been added to this list. The character Kurt first comes out to his friend Mercedes. Then in the next episode he comes out to his father. The father tells him he loves him and is glad he told him.

But as we all know television isn’t always like real life. For many people, coming out is an amazing experience. They’ll have family and friends there to support them and they’ll know that they will always be loved. But for some it can be disastrous. There family can disown them, their friends can leave them. Most LGBT worry about family the most, because you can always make new friends. So if you are considering coming out, ask yourself these questions:

· Will coming out jeopardize my situation at home?
· Is it safe, physically and emotionally, for me to come out to my parents?
· Do I have resources available (both emotional and financial) if coming out changes my situation at home?

Next you need to think of your reason for coming out.

Here are some good reasons to come out:
· You feel confident in your sexual orientation or gender identity.
· You feel like you have the support of family and / or friends.
· You are confident that coming out will help you grow and make you feel better about yourself as a person.
· You feel like the positives outweigh the negatives, and that you can handle possible negative reactions from friends and family.
· You feel comfortable with who you are.

Here are some not so good reasons to come out:
· A friend or partner is pressuring you to come out.
· You feel like you are lying to people if you don't.
· You feel like coming out will make you feel legitimately GLBT.
· You think coming out will make you feel more grown-up.
· You're mad at your parents and want to upset them.

Remember, coming out is a big deal. It shouldn’t be done to make anyone but yourself happy. Sometimes a person will come out to someone else they know that is LGBT. And sometimes the person they come out to tries to pressure them into coming out. But no one else knows when you are truly ready to come out except for yourself. So don’t let others force you into coming out. Coming out is something to do when you are ready.

If you’d like to read about people’s own coming out stories check out:
http://lesbianlife.about.com/od/comingout/a/TeenOuted.htm
http://ilovejesusbetterthanicecream.xanga.com/710503110/my-coming-out-story/
http://witchmale17.xanga.com/709448078/i-am-a-lucky-one/

And of course you can Google coming out. Leave a comment about your coming out story, or the reason why you haven’t come out yet.

And if here’s some tips on coming out:
· Pick a time when you, or the person you are coming out to, won't be distracted or tired.
· Don't come out in the middle of a fight, or an already tense conversation.
· Some teens find that having a conversation in a public place is a good idea because people are more likely to keep their emotions in check publicly.
· If you are concerned about your parents' reaction, consider coming out to a supportive relative, or other adult, first. Ask that person if he or she would be there when you come out to mom and dad.